初二英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯

　　初二英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯一：

　　Perfect Match

　　A wealthy matron is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same color as the vase. Several painters try to match the shade, but none comes close enough to satisfy the eccentric woman.

　　Eventually, a painter approaches who is confident he can mix the proper color. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous.

　　Years later, he retires and truns the business over to his son. "Dad," says the son, "there's something I've got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?"

　　"Son," the father replies, "I painted the vase."

　　絕 配

　　一位富婆為擁有一只珍貴的古玩而深感驕傲，以至于她竟要把臥室漆成與花瓶同樣的顏色。幾名油漆匠試圖調(diào)出這個(gè)底色，但是誰(shuí)也沒(méi)有能令那位怪癖的婦女滿意。

　　最后來(lái)了位油漆匠。他非常自信能調(diào)出那種顏色。那婦女對(duì)他的成果非常滿意，油漆匠于是一舉成名。

　　多年以后，他退休了，生意也交給兒子。“爸，”兒子說(shuō)，“有件事我得弄清楚，您是怎樣使墻的顏色與花瓶配得那么絕的?”

　　“兒子，”父親回答說(shuō)，“我漆了花瓶。”

　　初二英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯二：

　　Three doctors arrived in heaven. St. Peter asked them why they should be let into heaven.

　　The first doctor said,″Because I won the Nobel Peace Prize for my work.″ St. Peter let him in.

　　The second doctor said, ″I haven't won any prizes, but I've started free clinics and helped those in need forfree.″ St. Peter let him in.

　　The third doctor said, ″I'm responsible for all the hospitals across the United States.″

　　St. Peter thought about it for a minute and said, ″OK,I'll let you in, but you will be responsible for your safety!″

　　3位醫(yī)生到了天堂。圣彼得問(wèn)他們，為什么他們能進(jìn)入天堂。

　　第一個(gè)醫(yī)生回答因?yàn)槲耀@得過(guò)諾貝爾和平獎(jiǎng)。圣彼得讓他進(jìn)了天堂。

　　第二個(gè)醫(yī)生回答我沒(méi)得過(guò)什么獎(jiǎng)，但我開(kāi)設(shè)過(guò)免費(fèi)門(mén)診，免費(fèi)治病。圣彼得讓他進(jìn)了天堂。

　　第三個(gè)醫(yī)生回答我負(fù)責(zé)管理美國(guó)所有的醫(yī)院。

　　圣彼得思考了一分鐘，說(shuō)，好吧，我讓你進(jìn)去，但你要為自己的安全負(fù)責(zé)!

　　初二英語(yǔ)笑話帶翻譯三：

　　A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted(放屁) at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week."The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly."The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up yoursinuses(鼻竇) , let's start working on your hearing."

　　有位小老太太去看醫(yī)生：“醫(yī)生，我有愛(ài)放屁的毛病。其實(shí)也不是大問(wèn)題，只是我放屁不臭而且沒(méi)聲音。事實(shí)上，我在這里已經(jīng)放了20多個(gè)屁，但是你并不知道對(duì)吧，因?yàn)槲业钠ú怀簦�而且還沒(méi)聲音。”醫(yī)生說(shuō)：“好的，我明白了。吃這個(gè)藥片，一天三次連續(xù)吃七天，下星期你再來(lái)。”一星期后老太太來(lái)了，“醫(yī)生，你到底給的我什么藥，現(xiàn)在我放屁還是沒(méi)聲音，但是怎么這么臭!”醫(yī)生說(shuō)：“太好了!你的嗅覺(jué)正常了，現(xiàn)在開(kāi)始治聽(tīng)覺(jué)。”

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